WHAT THE FUCK HAPPEN?!
WHAT THE FUCK!!
idiotic , bimbotic , vain me. even what the f happens , i dont know.
what happen to my happy family?
what happen to the father i know that wil never hurt us in a million years.
what happen to all the family quality time together.
all these change bcos of money! DAMN THE MONEY!
damn you okay!

empty promise , all these was given bcos you do not want to hurt us anymore
bt do you know. lies hurt more then anything.
you broke my dreams , broke my everything, & now you wish i do not blame you.
i wish too. but i cant do it.
deep in my heart , engineers earn alot . but what about you?
FUCK FOOTBALLS MATCHES. thy ruin you, ruin us , ruin me.
f uckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
i never know how hard it is to be frugal.
now i know. & i swear i wont want to lead this life again.
please. i hope i could just die now. yes
even boiling water kills me !
i m tt bimbotic okay?!!
fuck hate thn kill me. i will thanks you by becoming your . whatever in my next life.

TIME TO GROW UP.
18 , AND PEOPLE ENJOY . I SUFFER. THANKS A MILLION
"MY FAVOURITE DAD IN THE WORLD"

Yes, i finally cried yesterday.
fr the same guy , i cried fr 4 months ago, or was it longer.
i thought i was over him.
initially thought.
i was right, i was never over him. was i ?
i don know. from the moment , havannias was on my leg. i felt like theres a familarity creeping inside me. a kind of emotion so strong that waiting to rush out like a running river.
cried myself to sleep. thought of those times together.
Told myself. its over , told myself i hv to stand strong. & not crumple down to such a state.
Told myself. i want him to regret. regret for not choosin me.
i m going to be more beautiful than ever.
i m not gonna cry anymore , i tell myself. cos i deserve better
and , zjw will come crying, crawling back to me!
i m back to one.
& i am going to climb from th very basic. and reach the top!

pimples -free.
Eyelid op.
(: Thats all i need to become gorgeous like forever . With no make up needed!
WOO
amazing yes. cmon (:

because tonight i will fall for you.

it has been total 6 days since he was online,
i don think he blocked me , cause facebook he last log in was 18 , which is last sat
.
damn , why didnt he online?
he is so damn fucking busy?
with what, school ? club? girls? or?
i dunno what. i m so confused.
sometimes just a simple talk would brighten up my days.
often just a bit of talks,question , i would appreciate it much.
but now. there wasnt even a simple hello.
i really hope you are here right now. yes tyfin. yes i miss you quite alot.
c:

ohgosh, finnnn(:

Been not talkin to him for 3 days alr i guess. or more thn that,
i really misses him.
didnt see him@ school too.
what happen to the fate between us?
缘分说的也奇怪，要它来，它偏偏选择不来，要它不来，它偏偏悄悄的找上来。
他和我，本来从来都不可能会认识的。本来的我，也从来不可能会对一个那么平凡的他有兴趣。
可能那么说，我很坏。
平凡到底要用什么来形容，用什么来表达？ 怎么样才算真正的平凡。
他，算平凡吗？
现在的我，真的好想他。
. everytime , i wanna type lots of things. when there are many needed to say,
however, when i start, i cant rmb what i actually want t say,
but , its in my heart. its painful,


i donknow whether its me , or my lonelineess in my heart.
its creeping up.
the love, the misses. it feels like a strong surge of emotions coming up.
maybe, maybe not. i really feel like theres something going on.
. are you or are you not , interested in me ?
shit .

朋友，
俗话说得好， 朋友不需要太多。 几个要好的就可以了。
也许， 我自己也不好。 所以和满多朋友也开始疏远了。

。。。 寂寞` 真的不好受。
我好想摆脱寂寞的怀抱。好想和自己心爱的人可以在一起。
18 岁的生日愿望，我只要这个
， 听起来，好可悲吧。
但说也奇怪。我不是什么丑女孩，
我是个别人看一眼，还会转回头看的那个“街上女孩”，
可能是平凡了吧， 所以，自己爱上的那个，从不留意我已爱上他。
或是， 他自己也没想到我会爱上他，
阿啊啊啊啊啊。。 我快要发疯了。
失心疯吧。=((.

hard work?

Hello peopleeeeeeee. i m back to post latest.

guess what , i really am losing it , i did talk to him .

ya la. my will power is not strong what . first plce it wasnt alr.. then i saw his nick lor.

"need your loving hands to pick me up " , then change to "fuck you"

woah. curiousity kills the cat . seriously=x

then we started talking, he was dota -ing thts why he late reply me.

should hv know, i kinda suspect him for not wanting to talk to me you see .

i feel bad. i ought to.

in the end , he was kind. whn i ask him like did i disturb him or stuffs.

he replied : no since he stop playing . then he went to bath like 20 mins cause insect died on him.

hahaha, was like funny and weird. cant help but laugh at him sometimes.

then he was back, and we continued our conversation.

i ask him about what he was going to do, dvd or slp. and he replied : nah, neither , talk to you first . Bahhhh, now we know why rach head over heels w him.

i mean he is a (: guy. good lah!

talk about marley and me , wonder , and my evil maid.

he was damn funny , call my previous maid mad. he was really a fun guy.

anw. came to the part he went to slp after talking like 30 mins with me ? was it 30 ? maybe lesser,

he did say a fucking nice thing : slp early okay!

oh god. rach , now is my turn to say he is cute ,

oh gosh! =="

stop it ! i m slping alr lah! bye everyone (:

LIARS,

Wew. i m blogging here , yes i m ,
whats that surprise expression for? no not you but is me i m talking bout.
cause i m the one reading all these nonsensical stuffs i m writting down here,
i havent talk t him. i m still keeping it. but bloody fuck . it seems i m not holding down any longer.
you know that kind of feeling ,
like i-miss-you-so-much-wanna-talk-to-you-but-dissapointed kind of feeling ,
yes i m feeling it now,
& it shucks to be honest.
nobody told me its going to be so hardwork and will to not talk to him
& bloody fuck , its just a talk. like it will hurt me --"
but i m too bloody fuck scared. yea i m a cat. whatever i say okay.
i m just a cat who havent even walk out of jiawei`s failure.

Anw, i googled him yesterday . no i m not a fucking pervert .
but internet is a slump ytd.
you know , there are hollywood stars of my every ex name, songs.
bloody fuck, & out of curiousity , i was wondering tyfin was it really a unique name like only he has it
and guess what i googled out, he was the only person that have this name out of like trillions people in this world.
WAHHHH. TALK ABOUT UNIQUENESS.
his mom definetely wants him to be unique.
okay i m definetely out of question now .
back-to-what-i-am-suppose-to-get-out-NOW
. pfft. i m a cat. i know im a cat.
okay , he is still online. & he havent talk to me. like he will.
miracles dont happen always you see boon jl ,
but i didnt missed this one didnt i ?
i m always being myself in this one, didnt act a single bit .
but why isnt he interested , in like at all --'
anw i googled. & shows on canoe polo info.
his fucking bloody bday is on feb29.
why does he even bother to hide his birthday from me.
& google even shows me to rachelle blog.
he is a fuck BLOODY mix blood --" wtf .
HE IS LYING ALL THIS WHILE?! but why?
he can be true to them but not me? why. do i pose a threat to you.
shita!

为什么事情总是那么复扎。
不管是那一个，总会让我在最有保握的时候让我从高处跌下来

好久了，都还没遇上彼此都会互相喜欢的人。
看着朋友，一个一个都开始有男朋友。不经意便开始觉得自己是不是没人要了！！
常常，晚上都是我思想的时间。
从“他”开始延续到我现在“有感情”的一个男孩。

“鱼翅”我和姐妹给他的小名，好久都没跟他说到一句话了。
不管怎么样否认自己喜欢他，但没跟他说话，
心里总会很难受。
像“邱”起来一样。

我好想他，不知道他最近好吗？

tyfin is all i can think now

I m not being me tday . its unlike me to just sit & type here early in the night.
he is not talking to me too.
i donknow what might happen next , but i m thinking maybe what winx say was right?
he was never interested in me.. okay , what now?
like i m interested?
m i ? it is quite a fun talking to him , relaxing &humorous.
he was my type.
he doont see looks. i know that , even if he did , i m not losing out anything..
okay since its secret blog. then i will say.
cos its the only place i can say i think i m quite pretty & nobody to critisize i buay ba or what!
hahahahhaha! =x
Seriously . i told winx , and she say that ,he was not interested in me bcos he did nt get my number. @ first i told her , i hope you are wrong. cos maybe tyfin is just not that type of auto person.
she said. i hope so.
oh frankly , winx . your words fucking come true everytime.
&&& i m really.. sad. yes fuckingly to be exact.
i hv had enough w single. i hv had enought of loving someone but he does not love me back.
i mean i had enough waiting for people.
i m seriously totally wept out, tired , shag-ed . i really want to just .. want to find a shoulder that could lend me to lean when i m tired,
but. what to do? i cant accept people who love me , but i dont love them ,
in a exact way , i m picky. i see looks.

i m fuckingly sick of like tyfin not talking to me. and pretending not to see me online when in fact i m just online in front of him.
nothing is coming out.
yes, just go away boon jiale .
tyfin wont like you , in days, months, years to come ! fuck off ):

Hey hunks and babes that visit here. errr. by accident or what?!
Lol. i m back from genting fyi (:

.Yes. he did online just now.
but he didnt talk t me. whats up man?
why did he change? fuck, hot & cold.
i had enough.
its time to live my own fuck life now.
no jiawei,. mickey. nor any fucking guys .
i do not need nor want them! ):